Just having a day

When everything is falling apart. Nothing works. The pain is knocking. The sheer touch of fabric from my shirt feels like needles. I cannot focus on anything. My breathing is metallic. The simple action of sitting upright at my desk poses an obstacle. I am lightheaded and dizzy. What is wrong you ask? Well I am just having a day. I wouldn’t call it a bad day, because I was able to get up, dressed, and spend time with my infant smiling all before leaving the house. I made it to work and have actually managed to keep breakfast down. BUT, I would also not call this a great day. So when it’s not bad but it’s not great… I am just having a day. A day that most of us know too well. A day that we count spoons. Screw that we count the handle of the spoon as well. Those day’s where we watch the minute hand of the clock, counting and thanking the lord you made it through the minutes that have passed.

This morning a success. This afternoon a mystery. The present… well I am holding on to the handle of my current spoon with the death grip and praying that I do not lose sight. Many people ask why I say I am “okay” or “good” when I am going through things such as today. Some people have even gotten upset with me or taken it personally that I did not come out and say “oh I am terrible!” Well the answer is simple. When the abnormal becomes your normal, you learn to push through it. You deal with what life throws at you without truly thinking about it. You become accustom to rolling with the curveballs of situations like this.

So to those having a day… Stay strong. You are not alone. Hold on to your spoons and live to fight another day.

Happy Friday my peeps!


Undefeated Diva

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